BITS & PIECES: New trend in potty humor not so funny

By JOEL PHELPS | The Arkadelphian

We’re charting new territory in Clark County with a digital Reader’s Choice Awards poll. This was a popular contest among readers of the Daily Siftings Herald’s each year and a high-stress project for the advertising representatives who organized it and saw it through. Some of our online-only counterparts in other counties make the Reader’s Choice contest part of their annual operation, and this is something we’ve wanted to try since our launch almost two years ago. Now that our audience is growing (the website is averaging more than 30,000 clicks each week), it’s time to give this a whirl. Ballots are open until May 31, and we’ll announce the results at some point in June once we’ve had time to dole out the certificates. CLICK HERE to cast your vote, but be sure to come back and finish Bits & Pieces.

In two weeks we’ll bid farewell to Kelly Stiles, who’s been our sales manager since fall 2022. That makes The Arkadelphian a one-man operation again. Challenging though it may be to juggle both editorial and advertising facets of a news organization, we’ll push onward. We wish Kelly the best in her new endeavor and know she’ll thrive. She’s done a fantastic job: in her short time she managed to grow this company’s revenue by 89%. She will definitely be missed here. Although the editor is no fan of the Star Wars enterprise, Kelly is, so it’s appropriate today to say, May The Fourth Be With You, Kelly.

Built a couch and a piano this past weekend.*

Tents are up at Town Square, the lot north of Arkadelphia Town Hall in preparation for Cinco de Mayo festivities. We hope to see you there.

Next weekend Arkadelphia’s two universities will be holding their respective commencement ceremonies. More details to come, but right now we know Henderson’s graduation will be on the evening of Friday, May 12, and Ouachita’s will be on the morning of Saturday, May 13. Arkadelphia will have hundreds of visitors during this time, so expect restaurants and shops to be busy. That weekend is also a good time for Clark Countians to showcase our community’s finest qualities. Welcome our visitors with a smile, explain kindly that our town is undergoing some major changes while overcoming some obstacles, and remind yourselves and our visitors that Arkadelphia is a Great Place to Call Home.

*Does it count if they were part of a Legos set?

For the record: We didn’t get an invitation.

We’ll keep calling male students at Arkadelphia High School “boys” as long as we continue hearing complaints that they’re destroying their restrooms. We applaud school board member Gina White for taking issue with this during a public meeting in April, after taking note of a maintenance report that detailed the damages. We understand that, generally speaking, teenagers are wired for stupidity — we were teens once, too — but behavior like this makes taxpayers foot an unnecessary bill. If it were up to us, those responsible for the destruction would be forced to conduct their personal business in the woods and to use what leaves are available for cleanup duty. It’s 2023, you can’t do that! Yeah, but sometimes (not always) creative punishment builds character and makes men out of boys.

In case anyone was wondering, there are two Arkadelphias in the U.S.: one in Arkansas, and another unincorporated community in Cullman County, Alabama.

We checked Thursday morning, but still no word on when our beloved Tiger Mart at 10th and Pine will (re)open, or whether it will retain its name or become a SQRL. One would think a cat would overpower a rodent, but hey, we’re not judging; we just want it open. Perhaps by the end of June?

Adore the Indigo Buntings while they’re here.

Joel Phelps is editor of arkadelphian.com. Opinions in Bits & Pieces are his own. He can be reached by email at editor@arkadelphian.com. Thank you, Jane.

Categories: Voices

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1 reply »

  1. Absolutely it counts! And if it was the piano that the keys move-you should have made a bigger deal about it! Also, I’m jealous! **love “Bits & Pieces”!!!**